Thursday, March 26, 2009

Fanfiction of a Japanese cartoon 'Inuyasha' (Completed)

‘Guess I don’t have much time…come here, Kagome.’ Inuyasha’s father said feebly. Kagome stepped forward and listen to him. ‘Kagome, I know you have the same ability as I have and I know you will use it in a good way. Please take care of my son, Inuyasha. Thank you very much, Kagome.’ After saying his last words, Inuyasha’s father passed away peacefully. Kagome was sorrowful, but at the same time she was surprised that someone knew she has the ability of seeing the future.

It was six hundred years ago, the world became tumultuous after Inuyasha’s father died. Inuyasha’s father was the most powerful demon in the world who married to a human lady and had a child named Inuyasha. Many naughty demons were so afraid of him. However, since they heard the death of Inuyasha’s father, they came out without the fear. Most of them wanted to get the powerful Shikon jewel from Kikyou.

There are many great subordinates who have been working for Inuyasha’s father. Kagome is one of them, but there is another great subordinate named Kikyou who used to be an excellent sorcerer and guarded the powerful Shikon jewel. Things changed after Inuyasha’s father died. Kikyou has become a wicked sorcerer and wanted to use the Shikon jewel in a bad way.
She wanted to control the world and she wanted to get whatever she wanted. Kagome has been trying everything to get it back, because horrible things would happen when bad people/demons have the Shikon jewel.

Unfortunately, Inuyasha has been fooling by Kikyou. He likes Kikyou; they played together when they were young. That’s the reason why Inuyasha has a special feeling for her.

‘What a lovely day!’ said Kagome.
The weather is very nice today; Kagome is using her magic to help people.
‘Kagome, we are running out of herbs.’ a young boy reminded her.
‘Yes, I think we should go to the herb land to get some more. Don’t you think?’ Kagome asked the boy.
‘Can I go with you, Kagome? I promise I will be a good boy.’ The boy really wanted to go and looked around the herb land.
‘Kagome! Kagome! I want to go with you, too!’ other children asked Kagome loudly.
‘Ok. Ok. You can go with me.’ Kagome said to the children and smiled.
‘Yay! Thank you, Kagome!’ Children were so excited about this.
So they held each other’s hand and walked to the herb land. Kagome also taught them those different kinds of herbs.
‘Kagome! See, I found it!’ Little girl said.
‘Good girl.’ Kagome smiled kindly.

‘Kagome….Kagome….’ a child screamed from the other side of herb land.
Kagome ran to the child and looked around vigilantly.
‘What happened, my dear?’ Kagome asked gently and worried, because she could tell how scary the boy was.
‘There is…..there is…..’ the child stammered.

Suddenly, the sky became dark and the wind was getting strong and fierce. Kagome told the children to stay together and used her magic to protect them in a circle.

‘Kagome, you must die today! Finally, I have found you! Remember what you did to me?!!!’ A demon appeared and talked wrathfully.
‘Huh, who are you? I don’t remember a thing.’ Kagome said provocatively.
‘Fine, go to hell then!’ The demon ran extremely fast to Kagome and discharged the noxious gas. Kagome couldn’t get a second to protect herself.

‘Move backward, Kagome!’ suddenly a familiar voice turned up.
‘Inuyasha!’ Kagome called his name.
‘Get out of the way, big fat demon!’ Inuyasha showed up.
He pulled his sword and pointed at the demon.
‘Let’s just finish this quickly.’ Inuyasha said.
‘Bring it on!’ The demon said and tried to use its sharp and big tail to attack Inuyasha.
Inuyasha ran and jumped higher on the top of demon, then cut it into two pieces. It doesn’t take a long time to kill the demon. Everything was back to normal and the sky became clear again.

Kagome ran to the children and asked how they were.
‘Kagome, what are you doing here with the kids?’ Inuyasha asked.
‘We are here to get some more herbs. See how many I have got!’ One of the children said and showed him the herbs.
Kagome stood up and asked, ‘Inuyasha, what are you doing here?’
‘I just passed by and heard some noise from this area. I was curious, so I came by and have a look.’ Inuyasha told Kagome what happened.
Kagome looked at Inuyasha and doesn’t say a word. However, Inuyasha has caught the sorrow look in her eyes.

‘OK. I think it’s time to go back to the village. Well done, everyone. Thank you for helping.’ Kagome said to the children. They put the herbs into a wooden bucket. Inuyasha helped them, too.
Everything looked nice when the weather was beautiful.
Children were singing songs and enjoyed the view.

‘Oh…‘ Inuyasha suddenly spoke.
Everyone looked at him and tried to find out what happened.
‘Kikyou…’ Inuyasha whispered.
Kagome could see Kikyou stood in the distance and glared hatred at her.

‘What are you doing here, Inuyasha? I was trying to find you. You took a long time to complete what I have told you to do!’ Kikyou said.
Kagome looked at Inuyasha again. She knew she better leave them alone.
‘Let’s go, children! We better leave now.’ said Kagome.
‘Why, Kagome? Are they going to fight?’ asked a little girl.
‘I don’t know, sweetie. But I think we should leave now ….or do you want to stay?’ Kagome asked jokingly and children were laughing out loud.
Unexpectedly Kagome turned back and said, ‘Guess who can run back to the village first!’ Then she started to run. ‘Wait up, Kagome!’ other children said loudly. Then only Inuyasha and Kikyou were standing there quietly.

‘I just came back…’ Inuyasha said.
‘You don’t know how much I worried about you.’ Kikyou said.
‘I am sorry…’ Inuyasha said.
‘and I hate to see you stand next to Kagome.’ Kikyou said sulkily.
‘Kikyou…don’t…’ Iuyasha wished he could change her mind.
‘Don’t say anything about her, Inuyahsa! You knew she is still trying to get the Shikon jewel. How dangerous that is! The Shikon jewel is mine! Nobody is going to get it from me!’ Kikyou said angrily. She held Inuyasha’s hand and said, ‘You can have my world, too. Inuyasha.’ Kikyou said in a soft voice and held Inuyasha.
Inuyasha knew she is getting crazy about the Shikon jewel which is a really bad thing.

‘Yes! I’m the first one!’ said Kagome happily.
‘It is not fair, Kagome. You didn’t tell us that we were going to run back home!’ other children complained, but they did enjoyed the running.
‘Alright, alright….Does anyone wants some sweeties?’ Kagome asked.
‘Me!!!! Me!!! I want sweeties!!!!’ children waved their hands and answered loudly.
‘Okay, now put down your wooden buckets and clean yourself. I will bring you some water and sweeties.’ said Kagome and went inside the house.
Children enjoyed the day and Kagome put up the herbs. Everything seemed so peaceful.

It was a quiet night, you could hear the sound that cicadas were making, and everyone was sleeping. Kagome was lying on the bed and tried to sleep, but suddenly a window was opened!
Kagome opened her eyes and tried to get a weapon. However, it was too dark at night and quite outside. Kagome couldn’t know where the person/demon was and she couldn’t light a candle, neither. Otherwise, the person/demon would see her.
‘Stop hiding!’ Kagome yelled.
‘Are you afraid, Kagome?’ a voice turned up at the window side.
‘Kikyou?’ Kagome said wontedly.
‘Surprised?’ Kikyou asked and laughed sinisterly.
‘What do you want? Why did you come to my room?’ Kagome asked.
‘I just realized that if someone wants to take control of the Shikon jewel, they need the pure blood.’ Kikyou told Kagome why she came here.
‘and now you are going to kill me. Huh?’ Kagome said

Kikyou used her magic to put up a table and throw it to Kagome.
‘Yes! I want you die so bad! I want the Shikon jewel and Inuyasha! I won’t let you touch them!’ Kikyou yelled and more things had thrown to Kagome.

‘You can take everything from me, but I won’t let you have the Shikon jewel! I promised I will protect it!’ Kagome said it out loud and used her magic to protect herself. She used the magic to toss Kikyou out of her room. They were standing on the roof and fighting. Kagome got serious hurt in this fighting. Even though some parts of her body were injured, she still kept fighting.

‘I am not going to let you get what you want!’ said Kagome in a tiring voice but resolutely.
‘Oh yeah?! Look at you! You are bleeding. How are you going to stop me? You don’t even have the energy. I can kill you now easily.’ Kikyou said.
She put most of her energy to create new strong magic to defeat Kagome.
When the dangerous magic came to Kagome, she could hardly handle it.
‘Ah……’ Kagome screamed.

Suddenly, a yellow light showed up and stopped the dangerous magic.
Kagome looked up and found out that was Inuyasha. She couldn’t handle anymore, she was unconscious afterward.

‘What are you doing, Inuyasha?’ Kikyou yelled.
‘That’s the question that I’m going to ask you! Kikyou, what are you doing? Why are trying to kill Kagome?’ Inuyasha asked puzzlingly
‘Shut up! You suppose to help me and by my side. See what you did.’ Kikyou was mad.
‘Kikyou, you are getting unbelievable crazy! Do you know what you are doing?’ said Inuyasha.
‘Of course I know what I am doing. I need her blood to take control the Shikon jewel, the world and you!’ Kikyou yelled loudly straight away without thinking. Inuyasha couldn’t believe what she just said. She broke his heart. He wondered where the nice Kikyou was. Things were totally different at that moment. Inuyasha just realized how wrong he was. He couldn’t believe that he was trying to help Kikyou. It was so wrong.

‘Um…’ Kagome groaned.
‘Are you okay, Kagome?’ Inuyasha asked gently.
‘Kikyou, I won’t let you have the Shikon jewel. I made a promise with Inuyasha’s father. I will do everything to get it back!’ Kagome said.

‘Huh! Why don’t you give it a try? Let’s see who the winner is.’ Kikyou said arrogantly.

Abruptly the Shikon jewel floated in the air slowly. Kikyou was trying to get it, but it rejected. Then she tried to use her magic to control it, but she couldn’t. The Shikon jewel stopped on the hands of Kagome.
‘Give it back! Kagome!’
‘It just came to me.’ Kagome said.
‘I said give it back to me!’ Kikyou said.
‘Take it back by yourself, Kikyou.’
Kikyou really wanted to get it back, but she couldn’t even touch it.

The color of Shikon jewel was dark purple. However, when it was on Kagome’s hands, it became pure purple.

This was not the end. Afterwards Kagome tried her best to take care of the Shikon jewel, although the fighting has always happening. Inuyasha has found a good heart in Kagome. He decided to protect Kagome and the world forever.

6 comments:

  1. Hi Bernice! I read your fanfic and I got to say that even if I don’t know much about that manga I found the plot about the “Shikon jewel” quite interesting. In comparison to your first draft, I found it easier to understand which character was who and what role they play but I’ve noticed that you didn’t give much attention to the jewel’s power and the fight it had initiated between Kikyou, Kagome and Inuyasha. For example, maybe you could have described the scene where the demon wants to kill Kagome more or what happened after Kikyou lost the jewel and maybe give less priority to the scene with the children. I also found few grammar and syntax mistakes (Kagome stepped forward and listen to him, who married to a human lady, etc.) but we could still get the general idea, so well done!!

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  2. (ha ha) Thanks for your comment, CrêpeNutella! I will try to improve my writing next time and your example that you just suggested me is good! I will shift the focus to 'the Shikon jewel' part. Yeah, good idea! Thanks again! :)

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  3. no worries!but just one last little thing I forgot...still about the description part of the story, next time think about giving details on the characters themselves, emotions,facial expressions,so that we can picture them (it's a manga remember).now that's all :P

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  4. (lol) Ok! More details next time :) Thanks!

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  5. Hi Bernice!
    Lots of imagination here and a solid example of the fantasy genre. I like the descriptive passages at the very beginning, and the introduction to all of the characters and what role they play in the story. It's a great means of finding out what purpose everybody serves. I don't really have anything bad to say except for maybe that I agree with CrepeNutella in some of the grammatical errors, but these are few and far between and don't detract at all from the story. You can still read it and be able to visualise a bright manga world, so great job! :)

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  6. Hi Chappie,

    Thanks for your comment : )

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